THE GOVERNMENT has finally found a way to completely eradicate traffic jams in Metro Manila – by turning the entirety of the Metro into an enormous parking lot.
With a lot of free space and excess funding, the government will start construction (or the deconstruction, rather) of the metropolitan area and start converting it into a parking lot full of stalled cars starting February 17.
This is the mother project of all the other infrastructure projects which would, in turn, contribute to the conversion of the metropolis into a car park.
The Metropolitan Manila Development Authority (MMDA), which will soon be called as Metropolitan Manila Parking Lot Authority (MMPLA), has enumerated for us these projects:
- Skyway Stage 3
- NAIA Expressway Phase 2
- Gil Puyat-Makati-Avenue-Paseo de Roxas underpass
- Sta. Monica-Lawton Avenue bridge
- CP Garcia Avenue-McKinley Hill ramp
- Repair and asphalt overlay of Magallanes Interchange
- EDSA-Taft Avenue flyover
- MRT Line 3/ LRT Line 1 extension common station
- LRT Line 2 East extension up to Masinag
- LRT Line 1 Extension (Cavite)
- EDSA-Roosevelt Ave. interchange
- España Avenue-Lacson Avenue interchange
- Repair/rehabilitation and improvement of South Superhighway Makati
- NLEX-SLEX connector road above the PNR alignment
- EDSA-West Avenue-North Avenue interchange
Faced with the possible scenario that students would probably be bombarded with lines upon lines of cars which would lead to their whining because they would have to walk to school, MMDA Chairman Francis Tolentino has recommended to Department of Education (DepEd) Secretary Armin Luistro to mull a 4-day school week.
“This scheme would ease congestion,” Luistro says in an exclusive interview with The PT. “The mental congestion of the students that is. This would also lessen education,” he added, “It would lessen education and energy costs.”
Until Luistro’s proposal has been approved, students would have to join other commuters in jumping from car hood to car hood to get to their destination on time.